Sometimes it’s not laziness.
It’s not a lack of commitment either.
It’s that internal feeling that something is “too much.”
Like a knot in your chest when you know something depends on you… and you’re not sure you can handle it.
If this happens to you, you’re not alone. And yes, it has a name: hypengyophobia—the fear of taking on responsibilities.
What does it feel like?
It can show up in very everyday ways:
- Constant doubts before making decisions
- Avoiding important opportunities
- Procrastinating on tasks that require commitment
- Feeling anxiety or freezing up when “something depends on you”
From the outside, it may look like indecision.
On the inside, it’s often fear.
What’s behind this fear?
Everyone has their own story, but there are common factors:
- Past experiences where making mistakes had painful consequences
- High self-demands or perfectionism
- Low self-esteem or insecurity
- Persistent anxiety
It’s not a lack of ability.
It’s a form of protection that once made sense… but today may be holding you back.
How do we work on this in therapy?
In a therapeutic space, it’s not about forcing yourself to change, but about understanding what’s happening to you and supporting you as you move forward with confidence.
Some of the things we explore:
Understanding your inner dialogue
Sometimes thoughts like these come up:
“What if I fail?”
“I’m not good enough for this.”
In therapy, we examine them together:
How true are they? Where do they come from? What experiences support them?
Exploring fear without judgment
Instead of avoiding it, we begin to look at it more clearly.
For example:
What are you really afraid of?
The mistake… or what you think it says about you?
Moving forward step by step
You don’t need to take on big responsibilities all at once.
We work with small, real steps:
making a decision, maintaining a simple commitment, tolerating a bit more discomfort.
That’s how confidence is built.
Developing a kinder relationship with yourself
Many people who experience this have a very critical inner voice.
In therapy, we learn to transform it—not through pressure, but through a more fair and human perspective.
An important message
If you identify with this, it doesn’t mean you’re weak or incapable.
It means there’s something within you that needs to be heard and supported.
And working on it is possible.
